Jumaat, 15 Januari 2010

post -penuh-emosi

just called my mak,and itu adalah rutin..rutin maksudnya is wat we normally do every day.. diz is just my opinion,and be sure dat im not a a thesaurus dictionary.

tibe2 ak emosi giler..rase cam nak nanges,nak tunjal2,nak maki.

mak cakap,relax la,bende kecik je. tapi kecik ke tuh? ceh,mesti mak cop aku nih ske exaggerate..pape jele mak,anak mak memang camnih..ngehehe..

rndunye kat adik
*mata berkaca wlpn xberkaca mata*

seryesly,ai memang syg die taw..and dats y la i update blog nih..coz mak n ayah da tido,kwn2 dah kol td..
jwa n eni n jaja xde,nisa ngah on phone, luckily ade broadband, so dptla update..ceh poyo gler ko fasha,pdhal x byr berokband nih lagi, pttf..haha

adik ai kene buli di sekolah taw..die baru darjah 1,die comel, die montok cam ai jgk..ouchh, we are sexy human beings taw.

tapi adik ai bijak.
die kelas 1 Bijak
ai tanya mak
"nape xklas A?'

*ai mmg ortodoks,ai slalu je anggap A tuh good,,well dah ai mmg slalu disogok dgn propaganda mcm tuh
 
"belajar rajin2,dapat UPSR 5A nanti taw"
-ok,ai dapat..ok,i genius..yucks,poyo

'belajar rajin2,dapat PMR 8A nanti taw"
-ok,ai dapat..ai bijak taw...sucks

"belajar rajin2,dapat SPM 10A nanti taw"
-ok,ai xdapat.ai dapat 8A je..ai da bosan ngn A..ceh berlagak,nah penampar sebijik! ouchh

mak ai cakap,klas B for Bijak and it is meant for budak2 bijak
A untuk budak2 pemulihan..(omg,so scary,kecik2 da kne g rehab?) shit

ok,back to story

mak ai tanye,mane pergi tie?
and bunyi die cam ni la kot..ai agak jele..

"tie sekolah adik mana? esok nak pakai lagi ni"
adik jawab
"xtaw"

mak carik dalam beg,jumpe,tapi tie da koyak separoh

kelakar la kau nih adik
sebijik macam kakak taw.
dulu time kakak sekolah rendah,kakak pon bodoh2 je...erkss,contradix to genius td

kakak pon sorok tudung sekolah
sebab tudung sekolah kakak hangus time kakak iron
kakak pon pretend
"tak jumpe la mak..cane nak gi sekolah ni"
omg,lame kan?

mak bijak,mak kol makcik,maksu,makteh
nah,pakai tudung nih,sok kite beli baru

ok,tapi mak jumpe jugak dalam mari
ok,siap ade cop iron agi,wow sexy yu...

ok,so adik ai n ai mmg same
tapi adik ai nih mmg naif sket,coz die letak tie yg separoh dalam beg sekolah die yang ade roda
kalau ai kat tmpat mak,sumpah ai gelak dulu baru tanye "KENAPA NI?"
owh,ai siap cekak pinggang,coz ai garang yu...


ok,adik ai bijak
owh ai ulang banyak2 kali
adik ai bijak
adik ai x ske gadoh2
die x balas
walaupon kat umah die selalu je tumbok ai.
sakit taw sayang!

adik ai bijak
die report kat cikgu taw
bijak kan?
budak tuh kene rotan!
yuhuuu,amek kau!
hahaha..

ai rindu giler kat adik ai
mak,ayah,ayen.fikri,abang..sory x ikot hierarki
well,kite bkn melayu ortodoks kan mak?
kakak kene basuh pinggan
abang kene basoh kereta
so lame

semalam mak tanye
"biler nak balek?"
tapi mak,sem nih adik bz gler,xleh balek..
sem nih ada KOKO
adik benci la
ade klas memadu memandu

tapi mak,
esok sebenarnye adik nak kua
adik ponteng tak dapat pergi kelas KOKO
adik nak pergi terpaksa pergi reunion
adik tengah bagitau mak nih
esok2 jgn cakap xibagtaw ye
ngeheheeeeeee

erkk,yu jgn konfius
ade ramai adik dalam rumah ai taw
kejap ai kire
1,2,3..
ok,3 org adik semuanye
tapi sume da besar
ai 19 20 tahun
adik ai 14 tahun
adik ai lagi 7 tahun

ai regard myself as adik taw
yuhuuu,sexy kan?

Khamis, 14 Januari 2010

vol 2# - fasha iss writing on writing

            If someone ask me to be a writer, I would think twice and hesitate and ask her to give me thousand reasons of what has taken her to think that I can write. I did some writings, which was last on my secondary school. That was my last time and it seemed to be like three years ago since I really wrote. I always have my head cracked to think of the ideas and materials to be written. I hate it when somebody, my teacher in fact ask me to write in the classroom at the moment. I cannot force myself to write, and I almost asphexiated even to make it half done. All I do is staring at the ceiling and hoping for the ideas to greet me. It makes sense for me to have my brain worked so that I do not write craps. It bothers me a lot to not annoy people.


          I do really hope I can be as good as J.K Rowling, not to mention as famous as her. Finally it worth a living for having something that can be proud of in life. Harry Potter sequel would always be my favourite. A stinky envy boy once said to me, “well,you are such a dreamer”. All I did was smirking my face,smiled, and went away. I could not afford to have my time wasted for such a looser. There is never wrong in hoping. Dare not to dream, it would not cost you any penny. Dream a lot, keep on trying, then only u can soar high. Life is just not a bed of roses which offers you happiness and joy for each time. For that reason, I did go to a writing workshop which is held by Faisal Tehrani. He is superb,awesome,amazing and there goes a list of nice words to describe him. I learn a lot from him, technically and spiritually. Who does not know him? Raise your hands and bang your head to the concrete wall and do not stop unless you know who he is.



          I wish I can write as good as Fynn Jamal. Do not worry, do not let your head banged as Fynn Jamal is not as famous as John Grisham. Does not famous does not mean you are no good. It is so lame to just read masterpieces written by well known author only, as everyone can educate. Fynn Jamal is a blogger, which it is kind of a trend nowadays to have your online diaries. I do have a blog too, which I think is good for me to train and push myself to write,at least anything I am interested to.


        I was in the middle of my steps on the dance floor. The sense of enjoyment overwhelming me until somebody in just plain T-shirt told me to lay low on the floor. For God forsaken, the place had been ambushed by the authority. Gross, I got nowhere to run. Then I heard some rumours spread. The club’s operation was illegal, which means it was against the law. Somehow it was better than being invaded by Taliban, at least. Everyone was asked to urinate to determine alcohol level in blood, and either we are drug addicts or not. ”Please, I am not”. I start to shiver. If only I did not go to the toilet half an hour ago. If only Sarah did not asked me to keep her company. If only I did not have a pee. If only. I was asked to urinate, which it was like the hardest thing to do at the moment. It was like when you got a full stomach, somebody offered you Nando’s, and it is all on him. I did succeed to urinate, after a three bottle of mineral water consumption and half an hour of waiting, in which it gave me hell. Writing is just the same.


         I do really hope I can write some in future. Although it might be hard for me at this moment, squeezing my brain just to write some rubbish. It might take me years but at the end of struggling hard, it worth it to see a colourful rainbow.



*ini correction yang aku buat.mmg ade same coz aku copy paste dpd 1st td..
*curious gler nak tggu kne reject lagi
*paragraph x balance,aku taw

#vol 1-fasha is writing on writing

           I was in the middle of my steps on the dance floor. The sense of enjoyment overwhelming me until somebody in just plain T-shirt told me to lay low on the floor. For God forsaken, the place had been ambushed by the authority. Gross, I got nowhere to run. Then I heard some rumours spread. The club’s operation was illegal, which means it was against the law. Somehow it was better than being invaded by Taliban, at least. Everyone was asked to urinate to determine alcohol level in blood, and either we are drug addicts or not.”Please, I am not”. I start to shiver. If only I did not go to the toilet half an hour ago. If only Sarah did not asked me to keep her company. If only I did not have a pee. If only. I was asked to urinate, which it was like the hardest thing to do at the moment. It was like when you got a full stomach, somebody offered you Nando’s, and it is all on him. I did succeed to urinate, after a three bottle of mineral water consumption and half an hour of waiting, in which it gave me hell.



          Writing for me is just another case of dragging myself to the darkest pit of the hell. I believe that not much people are blessed with the ability to write, and even harder to find people who got the talent of writing good pieces naturally. I always pray to God, for having Him bless me with the kind of capability. I wish I can be as good as J.K Rowling, or John Grisham. I am so ambitious, my dreadful classmate once said to me. As for me, there’s no wrong in being so ambitious if your expectation towards yourself is higher than anyone believes you are. If you cannot shoot for the moon, reach the stars then. Only me can discover myself, and I will let it out some other day. I do realize that the journey to success never cost me bed of rosses.



         My Art teacher once said, “ You would never want to stay still and do nothing to be a good writer”. It was like an eye-opening to me. Even a Parliament member has to work really hard to get elected. She suggested me few novels of hers. She introduced me some brilliant authors. She did asked me to read Enid Blyton’s, as she believed once a kid understand you and your thought, it resembled that you are accepted. I was reminded for about thousand times to keep on hoping yet not to stop practising as if I would die sooner.
Miss Lia did send me to a writing clinic back then when I was 15, held by Faisal Tehrani. Who do not recognize him? If somebody does not know him, I will say, “you are loser”. I really meant it, in any ways. He write about so many good things, from politics. Currebt issues, war, and environment.



           I adore so much Fynn Jamal’s masterpieces. I keep on wondering, how many days I would take to write a good essay like hers which she might takes like only half an hour to let it out. You might not know her as she is not an international writer. She is a blogger, in fact. She do write poem, in which I thought is the hardest thing to get done. Really, I cannot express what I am feeling. If you give me a piece of paper, I promise you, I would not make it dirt . It will remain white as it were.



          I am dreaming of becoming a genius writer and refuse to regard mine as masterpiece as it will only kill me. It is a real big thing if you can write good pieces of good contents so other people will feel good and they act good.I do believe that the capability of writing do come with a great responsibility. Do not be a jerk an only write stinky things and let the good one for yourself only. Sharing is caring.




*1st time lepas spm 07, aku tulis essay secara kritikal sambil ketuk2 meja cari idea. idea dapat,tapi kene
re-do. malang.suspens giler time dr yong cakap ade 3 org kne re-write. ceh,sekali aku kena.
aku,jahar,sebastian.ok la tuh.bukan sampai ade pendarahan otak pon.

giler terkial-kial aku tulis.agak sampah,tp akan diperbaik.practise makes perfect.

Rabu, 13 Januari 2010

aku-tak-mampu-memberi-tajuk

siapa mahu pinjamkan matahari?
nah,aku cagarkan semua yang aku ada

siapa mahu terbangkan aku awan?
nah,ambil segalanya

siapa mahu benarkan aku sentuh pelangi?
aku tak perlukan selainnya

rindu yang tak terhinggga nak menatap pelangi..kali terakhir aku lihat pelangi,aku sendiri tak mampu ingati..
dan aku sehingga kini tak mampu mentafsirkan perasaan tiap kali aku lihat pelangi.. semacam ada satu suara yang datang dalam diri aku sendiri untuk menatap lebih lama lagi.lagi.dan lagi.

sedikit klise kalau diamati secara literal..betapa aku alpa terhadap kewujudan pelangi,yang tak mampu ditandingi oleh spektrum prism.

berilah aku sejuta warna,tetap aku pilih pelangi terbias
berilah aku milion filem,aku tetap mahu tonton pelangi

pelangi yang terbias,yang muncul tak terduga
pelangi yang kabur terbias,yang hilang tak berpesan
pelangi ufuk senja yang tak berpenghujung

kredits untuk dr.yong yang mengingatkan aku
tentang keindahan pelangi
tentang kesempurnaan pelangi
tentang warna alam
tentang kehidupan

mari
dekat padaku
aku tatangpeluk sepenuh jiwa

hidup ini berjuta warna
di hujung sana pelangi indah

Khamis, 7 Januari 2010

aku-tak suka-bagi-tajuk-spesifik

hidup ini roda.kau tak percaya?hidup ini kitaran.putaran.pusingan.rentetan.

kau penah lalui situasi ni?
kau jadi nombor dua. kau menduakan. kau diduakan.adil bukan? kau jadi perampas,dan hak kau dirampas.mahu mengamuk?nah.cuba.aku mahu lihat kau akan berkata,
"ini tidak adil"
tunggu saja penampar tunggal di sekitar kau.

kau kata kau kool kalau kau rasa kau kool. tapi aku yang lihat,aku rasa kau fake.kalau orang lain lihat,orang akan kata hipokrit.

kau pakai baju ketat.nampak susuk menngiurkan.kau kata Minah kolot. die pakai baju kurung pesak gantung. emak Minah kata Minah nampak manis. boyfren Minah kata Minah sopan. rumets Minah kata Minah nampak ayu.kau kata Minah kolot. kau kata Minah outdated. kau kata Minah tak ikot fesyen. orang kata kau apa?

bodoh.celaru.angkuh

bodoh; kau jadi mangsa kerakusan fesyen.fesyen evolve every seconds.

celaru; kau tak tau apa yang cantik untuk diri kau.kau tak taw untuk jadi apa. Lady Gaga kah,Paris Hilton kah..yang pasti kau Joyah,bukan kelahiran metropolitan London.

angkuh:
kau kata kau cantik.up to date.kau kata Senah selekeh,pakai tudung jatuh di dada.

hey c'mon Joyah tolol,kau tak akan ke mana. tinggi mana kau terbang,tak teringin cium hanyir bau tanah kah?
tak mahu hidu klorofil hijau?
selamanya mahu terawang di awanan?

teruskan.

lihat betapa pengalaman menjadi guru terbaik. kau dikejar dan hampir mahu diterkam harimau kumbang,kau mahu terus menceroboh ke dalam kandang binatang itu? aku tak maksudkan kau ialah Steve Irwin. aku maksudkan kau ialah Bedah,Seah,Joyah,Leman,dan mungkin Muthusamy.

kau serik.kak?
lihat,aku kata.
pengalaman yang bererti
pengalaman semalam yang tak akan mati
pengalaman yang kau saja mengerti


*ini bukan entri-untuk-kau..dan ini random.